Attendees gather for an evening of conversation and connection (Courtesy image: Stefan Ciancio)
In a city of more than eight million, making a new friend can sometimes feel surprisingly difficult. New Yorkers are notoriously busy, technology has increasingly shifted social interactions online, and the demand of daily life can leave little time for building meaningful relationships. Together, these circumstances have left many city residents looking for new ways to build genuine connections.
Inside Barkada Social Club in Astoria, Queens, people gather over drinks, striking up conversations with strangers they might otherwise never have met. Some arrive alone, while others come with friends, creating opportunities to connect beyond their usual social circles. Through name tags and conversation starters, Astoria Connect encourages attendees to find common ground with people from different backgrounds and turn an unfamiliar face into a potential friend.
That’s the idea behind Astoria Connect, a community group that brings people together through social events designed to help strangers meet and form friendships.
Astoria Connect founder Stefan Ciancio started Astoria Connect three years ago after reading about a man who moved to Austin without friends and began hosting gatherings at his home. If it could happen in Texas, why not here?
“If I could get a lot of people for a limited amount of time with the name tag and something interesting or funny about them written on it, friendships will form,” Ciancio said.
The first Astoria Connect event had just four people, including Ciancio. The second had about 30, and the event has continued to grow ever since. These days, the monthly event draws over 100 people, Ciancio said.
Ciancio said that technology and the Covid-19 pandemic has changed how people socialize, making face-to-face connections more difficult.
“I think we have a phone culture so everyone’s on their phones all the time. People have definitely forgotten how to socialize a little bit,” said Ciancio.
For long-time attendees like Shannon Blackschen, Astoria Connect has become more than an occasional night out. She has attended since nearly the beginning and said that the events have helped her develop a community.
“I definitely branched out and met people that are actually my friends. The people here that I’ve met have helped me branch out into other friendships and friend groups and we look forward to seeing each other at every event,” said Blackschen.
Those relationships are exactly what Ciancio hoped would come from the gatherings. He said he has personally made about three close friends and around 100 acquaintances through Astoria Connect.
“It makes the neighborhood feel small. It’s nice to have a friendly face wherever you go,” Ciancio said.
Shushil Purushotham, a first time attendee, said that the decision to join the most recent event was simple.
“Why not come, what’s the harm in meeting more people especially when I feel like it’s so hard these days,” Purushotham said.
About the author(s)
Libby Heckert is a journalist and M.S. candidate at the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism.